"Listen, why on earth you want to hear about this one is beyond me completely. This story is big. Too big."

"I don't care if your boss needs to know about this. He should ask Eve herself and be done with it."

"Oh, he didn't Reveal to you why he didn't, huh? You just have to love ineffability. Fine, fine, it's your funeral. You didn't hear this from me, OK? And you better hope there aren't any recording devices around…"

"There aren't? How do you know … oh, right. Useful trick to have, I must say. Anyway, your boss wants to know why Laurence keeps supporting the Archangel of Women when she's always taking him to task. Well, I heard this from a Choir-mate (never mind who) who got it from somebody who was there to witness a meeting between the two. My guess is as good as yours whether it's true or not."

"Yes, yes, I'm not thinking clearly. Of course you'd be able to discern the Truth better than I could. I see that your Choir still hasn't gotten your collective heads around idiom yet. You want to hear this story, or what?"

"I'm getting to it, I'm getting to it. Anyway, when Eve descended the ladder, my buddy told me that Laurence was a little confused, naturally, but he didn't freak out as much as some of the others. After all, he was doing his job, unlike some people he could name. He welcomed her to the Seraphim Council, let her take up her position, and didn't give her any trouble at all. And, in return, Eve starts tearing chunks off of everybody who didn't "remember their mission to aid humanity" - including the aforementioned Laurence."

"Yes, you Know this already. Unfortunately for you, I give information best when it's presented in narrative form, with full background. Feel free to ping me and see."

"I mean for you to use your freaking resonance, you literal-minded pedant."

"Thank you. As I was saying, Laurence was a little shocked at all this, but since he's not the type to wash dirty linen in public … I mean, because he decided to privately discuss the matter, he asks Eve to stop by his HQ and talk about things. All very polite and civilized.

"Now, picture the scene. Eve shows up, and seeing as Laurence has, shall we say, issues about private meetings with extraordinarily majestic, putatively married women, there's a bunch of chaperones from both sides. That's how I was able to hear what happened next. Laurence is being very polite about the whole thing, but he's firm about explaining to her that he was, in point of fact, General of the Host, and sometimes has to make unpleasant decisions about how to fight the War. Unless, of course, she has orders from God to supercede him?

"Eve shakes her head, and equally politely, tells him that God wouldn't have done that without telling him, of course. Still, she did think that Laurence needed to alter his methodology a bit, and she wasn't alone in thinking this. Laurence was free to disregard her opinions, absent a direct command from the Almighty. But he should know that she wasn't alone in her opinion.

"Laurence raises an eyebrow at this and asks her who else agreed with her. Eve reaches into a sleeve of her robe and pulls out a sealed missive."

"I see that got your attention. It certainly got his: Laurence went absolutely still when he saw the sigil. With what my contact swears was a noticeable shake in his hand, he opens the letter, reads the message, and just stares at it for a while. Then, in front of both his and her people, he bows down and kisses her feet. And he hasn't undercut her since."

"What, you think I know what's in the letter? I wouldn't have a clue. What would make you think that I did … right. Damn. Ping me again when I say this: you really, really don't want to hear this next part."

"You'll take the chance? Tough luck on you, pal. Now, apparently someone was in a position to see the actual message after Laurence dropped the letter on his desk. She or he happened to know the older dialects, so it was comprehensible. It was a short message. Come closer and let me whisper it to you."

"The message was five words and one letter long. I swear, on my Honor, that it said:

"'Byproducts of corporeal digestive processes', indeed."