The Three Faces of Elvis: Corporeal
Elvis Presley, of course, is currently enjoying his
afterlife as a blessed soul in the service of the Sword: before you ask about the entire gluttony
thing - hello, but didn't that scream "Shedite of Gluttony
possession"? The chronicles of the
Memphis, TN Three Elvis Campaigns during the early Seventies make for riveting
reading. Much like the War of Jenkin's
Ear, the ostensible reason for the fighting was pretty much just an excuse,
which is probably why permanently rescuing Elvis Presley from being a Shedite
chew toy never seemed to take place.
Laurence cleaned up the mess afterwards - as usual - and took in the
blessed soul as partial recompense.
And, of course, Love Me Tender; the Archangel of the Sword's
weakness for that song is well known, if never much talked about. So, yes, Elvis is very happy now, working
out his few remaining mental problems and feeling all right.
Well, except for one minor problem. Somebody stole his corpse.
The alarms were tripped - yes, there were alarms,
although nobody corporeal will admit to them - so that would argue a mortal
agency. On the other hand, the
Disturbance that resulted when the thief met the guards would argue for someone
a touch more supernatural. Either way,
the PCs are going to be drawn in as part of the investigation; Laurence is
taking the reasonable view that if a metaphysical agency wishes to illegally
acquire the corpse of Elvis Presley, it's probably for reasons which Heaven
might take issue with. On the other
hand, this is probably not going to be something that might shake the very
foundations of the War, so assign the problem to some PCs and let them go
poking around.
All in all, it was a good call by the Commander of
the Host. The grave robber in question
- a fellow by the name of Edward G Wilson - is a... not so much 'particularly
demented' necromancer as one who is demented in a notably different manner than
most of his peers. Edward is rather
obsessed with the works of H.P. Lovecraft (undoubtedly to the latter's
distress), especially the ones involving Charles Dexter Ward and Dr. Herbert
West. The guy thinks that he's worked
out a way to reanimate the dead; what he's actually done is developed a method
by which corpses can be turned into a powder that then can be turned into a
zombi, which can then be turned back into a powder when not needed. This is going to be very useful to Hell,
unfortunately. Once they find out about
this, it might even earn Edward a relatively pain-free afterlife.
Fortunately for the Good Guys, Hell doesn't know
about this yet - because Edward's best friend is Kim, a Balseraph of Technology
who is in on this project for his own reasons: access to the brain of Elvis
Presley. You see, one of the Shedim
that used the King for its fun was also involved in a convoluted scam designed
to hide a valuable [insert MacGuffin that you were planning to spring on your
party anyway]. Unfortunately, all involved
ran into the Eighth Virtue - literally - and they're all permanently dead. But a Shedite's thoughts sometimes bleed
into those of its victims, and zombis can retain fragments of the original
soul's memories, and Kim read somewhere that human memory is holographic, so
he's got this nifty device that he made that he's sure will let him read
Elvis' zombified, reconstituted brain.
What could possibly go wrong?
Yes, it was a stupid question, but after the zombi
Elvis burst free of its bonds and started its rampage across Memphis, it wasn't
precisely one that Kim can currently answer.
If the PCs haven't made it to this point yet, this would be a fine time
for them to meet the Undead King and all his buddies. Poorly understood Vaputech radiation mixed with pseudoscientific
necromancy can give the oddest results; a zombi that can animate any corpse
within twenty feet after five minutes continuous proximity isn't even in the
top ten of Weirdest Technology-Based Disasters. This may not encourage the PCs, but the vicious parody of Elvis
meets Thriller will hopefully keep them amused and motivated long enough
to put down the zombis, track the Undead King to his lair, destroy it and find
the MacGuffin (turns out that Kim was right: a pity that he's too busy
clutching his Heart and screaming to care).
Rewards? Laurence's favor, Elvis' thanks and the MacGuffin; also, at a later point they get to meet Edward again, probably at the head of a shadow army of the famous, restless dead. This last bit doesn't sound like much of a reward, but it does give your players a chance to shoot infamous historical figures, which they often appreciate. Something to keep in mind.