Iron Rev: Eating Raw -  Ewwwll.

 

There's a bit of a problem going on in [Insert campaign city here].

 

No, it's not that a Stoneskin Gang and one of Baal's crack urban insurgency teams have decided to move into the same neighborhood.  That's fine.

 

No, it's not that the two groups have quickly ironed out any pesky little dissonance conditions that would prevent them from cutting each other into ribbons.  That's fine, too.

 

No, it's certainly not that the neighborhood in question has become a war zone that generates a few used-up vessels a night.  Well, that is a bit of a problem, but not the one that's a concern.

 

No, it's not even that the vessels aren't making it to the morgue.  [Insert head of faction here] knows that nobody wants the [insert colloquial term for homo sapiens sapiens here] to start examining them, after all.

 

The problem is that nobody knows where the vessels are going.

 

This seed is suitable for either angelic or demonic parties; they've been tasked with tracking down where the vessels are going and presumably putting a stop to the disappearances.  Not many entities on either side are particularly interested in stopping the rumble, by the way: bitter gang fighting is what Servitors of Stone and the War do.  In fact, it's made clear that the PCs are supposed to interfere with their compatriots' amusement as little as possible (although joining in is fine, just as long as the important mystery is solved).

 

We'll pass over trying to stake out a war zone while there's gunfire and chainsaws going on; this is, after all, just a seed and I don't need to tell you how to make your players' lives interesting.  What's important is that, eventually, after one particularly bloody battle the party will see two figures dragging off a corpse from either side.  Presumably, they'll investigate.

 

When they do, they'll discover that the figures soon separate, each bringing his prize to one of two local restaurants: a fried chicken place and a sushi bar.  Investigating that will lead to the entirely unpleasant discovery that angelic and demonic corpses have been slated to be the secret ingredients in (respectively) Special Sweet Glaze and Super-Duper California Rolls.  By the way, if anybody in the party had earlier showed any interest in getting some food for the stakeout... well, I explicitly give you permission to do what you're thinking of doing to them.

 

Backgrounds for these two guys is, well, interesting: they're both five Force normal humans who happen to own fast food restaurants, if the phrase 'normal' can include the concept of 'barking mad, paranoiac conspiracy theorists'.  One of them came across a 'space alien' 'scanning the area' right after the gang war started; he called in his not-precisely-friend and set up an ambush.  As the 'space alien' was actually an Impudite of Technology too engrossed in field-testing his shiny new Disturbance sensor goggles to pay attention to the two humans sneaking up behind them, the fact that they succeeded may not be too surprising.  When the Impudite of Technology gets out of Trauma, I'm sure that he'll have a different story, but right now he's too busy whimpering.

 

Just why the two decided to take a bite of the corpse is thankfully a bit of a mystery; sometimes you just don't want to know, and, no, there are no Servitors of Gluttony in the area, no doubt to their eventual dismay.  Sometimes you just get some freaky humans, OK?  We're talking about the species that invented clown porn, after all.  So, the humans took a bite, found it good, checked out the goggles, found that they were good - as well as somewhat mutagenic, which actually probably does explain why the guys suddenly got a hankering for fillet of celestial  - and now are in the business of taking advantage of the sudden supply of 'space aliens' to augment their cuisine.  The customers certainly seem to approve; so much so that one of the, well, not cannibals.  Celestivores? - anyway, if it looks like a slow night one of the humans will go out with a sniper rifle and drum up some carnage.  Not often necessary, though.

 

It really would be useful if at least one player-character found out that he had been eating long bird / snake / whatever, especially if the involuntary donor owed him money, or something - because the boring option is to let the cops handle this one, and even if it wasn't futile (for reasons which will obvious shortly) it's still just not as much fun as letting the PCs storm one or the other fast food joints, Fiery Swords blazing.  Of course, 'fun' is a slippery concept, as anybody who does is going to discover that the humans have the other items that the 'space alien' had on him.  Such as the 'blaster rifle', the 'fusion grenades' and the 'particle beam shotgun'.

 

Actually, upon reflection I'm not entirely sure why those last three are in scare quotes.

 

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