"Do you know what oblivion really is? It's… nothing. You see it coming, barreling down the way to crush your soul, and you stand and wait for it. You think, 'Well, it’ll finally be over. I can finally rest, and forget it all.'
"Wrong. Nope. Not like that at all.
"What really happens is that you stop. Completely, totally stop. No thinking, no existing, no rage or fear or pain or sight or sound or rest or peace or solitude: you just END. It's not an instantaneous process, quite: you have just enough time to realize that this is coming, and it's not what you expected, and there isn’t a blessed thing you can do about it. Then you lose it all. No rushing wall of blackness, no velvety curtain of silence, just … nothing.
"But that's not the worst part. The worst part is when oblivion doesn't quite take. Every so often I would flicker back into existence for a second or two, helplessly feeling things again, and then poof! Oblivion came back. I don't know how many times this happened: it certainly seemed endless, when it was happening. Wake up, scream internally, drown again, wake up, scream, drown, wake, scream, drown… towards the end I was begging for oblivion to go away, for my Word to be as naught, to feel something, anything, for more than a millisecond at a time…
"… and then I did. I felt the Light, and I had to make a choice again. A proper choice this time, not one fueled by shock and self-pity. So I chose to exist, and let others exist, and to help them try to understand just what a gift existence is. I'm glad that I no longer hold the Word of Memory.
"After all, I failed It in the moment of crisis. I won't fail the Word of Appreciation."
Mariel
Cherub Master of Trailblazing
Angel of Appreciation
Corporeal Forces: 4 Strength: 7 Agility: 9
Ethereal Forces: 5 Intelligence: 10 Precision: 10
Celestial Forces: 6 Will: 12 Perception: 12
Word Forces: 12
Vessel: middle-aged human female/2
Skills: Dancing/3, Detect Lies/3, Dodge/3, Emote/3, Fighting/3, Knowledge (Gusto's Organization/5, psychology/3), Savoir-Faire/4, Singing/3, Tactics/2
Songs: Affinity: (Celestial/2), Attraction (Celestial/3), Correspondence (All/1), Empathy (All/1), Harmony (Corporeal/1, Ethereal/3), Healing (Corporeal/1, Ethereal/3, Celestial/2), Light (Ethereal/3, Celestial/1), Memory (All/3), Shields (All/2), Solace (All/2), Succor (All/2), Thunder/1. Mariel once knew the Songs of Forgetfulness and Oblivion, but her Redemption has burned that knowledge away. She's not interested in finding them again.
Attunements: Cherub of Gusto, Ofanite of Gusto, Inspire, Party Favors, Master of Trailblazing, Angel of Appreciation
Angel of Appreciation: A human in Mariel's presence will always notice when someone else does a virtuous, selfless, or kindly act. Humans will also find themselves more prone to doing such things on their own: any fears or worries that might prevent the mortal from acting according to his or her better nature will seem petty and unimportant. Mariel sometimes gives out the first part as a Servitor Attunement.
Rites:
: Talk someone out of committing suicide.
: Spend two hours looking for beauty in one's surroundings … and finding it.
When Haagenti stood before the Council, was Redeemed, and took on his new role as holder of the Word of Gusto, no one noted the little curlicue of smoke and darkness that spun off of him at the moment of his exaltation. It had fled to a corner and pulsed softly as the new Archangel found himself led off to be shown to his new comrades. Above, the light of the Higher Heavens receded and began to fade, dimming the now empty Council Chamber. But, at the last second, the fading stopped, and a narrow ray of light streamed down right next to the bundle of darkness.
After an endless moment of pure silence, the darkness moved into the light, and was destroyed, and was transfigured…
The Council found Mariel the next morning, still rapturously looking upward, lost in the moment where she had basked in the light of her God after all these long, dreary millennia. They recognized her, of course: a couple of them weren't even completely surprised. The rumors that Oblivion had lived on, after a fashion, had been bandied about for centuries. They hadn't particularly expected to find her here, Redeemed (albeit in weakened form), and Word-bound to Appreciation, but it had been an absolutely insane week, anyway.
Haagenti wouldn't have blamed Mariel one bit if she hated him for the rest of eternity: after all, in his previous existence, he had eaten her whole. This shamed him now, but the Archangel was brave enough to take whatever anger and frustration she wanted to dish out, silently, without rancor or excuse. It came as a big surprise to him, then, when she turned three cartwheels and swung him around in a 4-dimensional dance of pure joy. It came as a bigger surprise when she absolutely insisted on being Gusto's first Word-bound Servitor.
These days, Mariel is Haagenti's right-hand Servitor. She's the one that angels of Gusto go to when they need to know where their Archangel is this week, the one who reminds Haagenti about events and meetings that he really should be attending, and generally keeps him about as grounded as one could realistically expect from an Ofanite. In her copious free time, she enjoys going down to earth and getting a feel for the Creation she labored so strenuously - and thankfully, futilely - to destroy.
What an ironic place the world is.
Ain't it keen?