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Randomizers

As I walked out of the diner, I took stock. Let's see: one dead robber (a shame, but he wasn't very good, and humans should really learn to not disturb their betters at mealtime), one room full of scared monkeys, and a brat who'll have nightmares for years about the shotgun blast that nearly took off her face. Lots of lovely, messy chaos there. Plus, of course, a damn good breakfast of bacon and pancakes (I hate eggs). A good start to the day: but there's still the bag full of stolen wallets and purses to deal with.

Oh well: the universe would provide. It always does…

…and it did, an hour or so later on the subway. I looked over and there he was, a pathetic little human hopped up on his own importance and a variety of illegal substances. The universe was practically holding up a blinking sign, pointing at him and saying "NEEDS SOME EXCITEMENT! NEEDS SOME EXCITEMENT!" Well, we do aim to please.

Trailing him back to his haunts and intercepting him away from his kind was simple: shutting down his brain more so. I grabbed his wallet, sorting through the junk until I found a name and address. The universe was certainly making it easy for me this morning.

A quick check of the bag revealed the original crook's wallet. I transferred a couple of personal items from one to the other, where the loser wouldn't find them for a while. Then I removed all the cash and left the bag by his snoring, pathetic monkey head. The original crook's wallet I ditched five blocks away in a drain. It was about time to change fingerprints again, alas. The old ones were so pretty.

On my way back to a marginally better part of the city, I took stock. The second monkey would be waking up right about now, a little confused but with a gift from the goddesses (well, at least one goddess) in front of him in the form of a wide variety of "untraceable" major credit cards. He'd enjoy the next few hours, right up to the point where the cops came calling, helpfully alerted by an anonymous tip that thoughtfully provided them with his name and pitiful nest. If the stolen cards weren't enough to link him to the late, unlamented robber, then the stuff in his wallet would. I have infinite faith in a monkey's ability to come to the wrong conclusion. And, seeing as this part of the corporeal plane considers all defendants in a crime that ends in anybody's death as eligible for a murder charge, there was going to be lots of lovely, messy chaos floating around today.

I do so enjoy involving the worst dregs of humanity into my art: mortals may be our inherent inferiors, but they're advanced enough to let one enjoy noblesse oblige. Besides, it’s a bit of protection when the Malakite Lady comes calling. Still, if the universe hadn't provided, I would have had to use somebody.

The chaos is the important thing: the lovely, messy chaos.

 

Resonance

The resonance of a Randomizer is for chaos. Preferably, the raw, heady, undiluted stuff: the weirder things get, the happier a Randomizer is, because they can nudge and direct probability for their own ends. You can get away with a lot more when things are wild and wooly.

Dissonance

A Randomizer has his or her own twisted sense of responsibility towards their putative inferiors. They take dissonance if one of their stunts kills an innocent mortal. This dissonance can only be removed if the demon somehow manages to bring the human back to life and sets up an equally nice thing to "randomly" happen to the unfortunate soul. Randomizers are quite fond of Mammon for pushing lottery tickets among humanity.

Of course, "innocent" is such a fluid word.

Manner and Appearance

All Randomizers have the Celestial Song of Form/3 (paid for normally). One of their specialties is to be the Bumbling Fool that manages to drop the monkey wrench into the works at just the wrong time, and you really need to be able to change your face on a regular basis to do the job right. They tend to favor an innocuous appearance, for much the same reason. Randomizers can have Roles, but they try to keep them separate from their other activities. They can't help occasionally upbraiding the more uppity of their mortal coworkers, though.

In their celestial form, they manifest as winged humanoids comprised of glaring, garish, ever-shifting colors. These colors (and voices) change slowly enough so that they remain recognizable in the short term, but demons of other Bands don't even bother trying to keep them straight. Some resort to just calling all Randomizers "Bob" or "Ethel" (with varying reactions). On the whole, they tend to get along best with Habbalah (who see them as possibly the only other angels in Hell) and Calabim (who just love having one of them along in a fight). Balseraphs dislike them immensely, as Randomizers are about the only Band that can match them in arrogance. There is also a mutual loathing between them and Vapula's minor Band of Regulators.

Regulators think of themselves as orchestra conductors rather than musicians. Humans provide the instruments: Randomizers make it a pleasing whole. Pleasing to a Randomizer, at any rate: who cares what the musicians think?

Sometimes, the twisted sense of noblesse oblige that infests this Band becomes real. Those who find themselves showing more mercy run the risk of Redeeming and becoming Merry Pranksters, a Choir with near-identical abilities, but wildly different personalities. Janus is the employer of most Merry Pranksters (he can also apparently create them), and may be almost as active as Ofanim. On the other hand, a Merry Prankster who plays too much with the universe and stops caring about the fallout can eventually Fall and become a Randomizer. It's all very odd.

Game Mechanics

A Randomizer's resonance is for probability: what's likely, what’s possible, and what can become likely if you nudge things a little. Even these demons find it impossible to accurately predict events for more than a few minutes in advance, and sometimes (very rarely) they're just flat-out wrong. More often, they see several likely outcomes at once, and have to play it by ear. Lastly, their resonance only works within line of sight, or else through use of the Song of Projection.

But within these limitations, they can be amazingly effective. Just knowing what will happen next is often sufficient, if you're clever and sneaky. Most Randomizers are clever and sneaky indeed.

Resonance Check Digit Table

1. You know the most likely outcome of any situation or action done within your presence.

2. You know the above, and just how likely it is.

3. You know all possible outcomes, and their likelihood, without specific details. "He could easily trip and fall" is acceptable: "there's a 60% chance that he'll break his neck if he keeps walking and steps into the pothole" is not.

4. As above, but you can pick a particular outcome and determine its likelihood.

5. As above, and you know of a way to improve that possibility a bit.

6. A plan, worthy of Rube Goldberg, pops into your head. Anything is possible, as long as it isn't actually impossible (that is, violates the laws of physics) or requires activity from an entity or object currently beyond your range of perception. For example, if you're being attacked by a demon, you cannot expect gravity to reverse itself, or for a duck to materialize out of nowhere and hit your attacker. However, you could kick a stone, which splashes into a lake, whereupon a napping hunter wakes up, sees a flock of ducks that were flying overhead anyway, and shoots, actually hitting one, which then crashes down on the demon's head…

Incidentally, spontaneous celestial combustion is completely forbidden, unless the Randomizer rolls an Infernal Intervention. This is considered unfair.

Anyone playing a Randomizer should be allowed a little more time to come up with a plan of action, but not hours (or even minutes). The resonance itself is effectively instantaneous.

More Sophisticated Uses of Resonance

Sometimes knowing the odds is enough. With a successful Intelligence -4 roll, the Randomizer can bump up a the check digit on a successful resonance roll by 1 (the check digit can never be increased to 6 in this way, or indeed by any other method besides rolling it naturally).

Using this resonance successfully in combat translates to at least a +2 to the Dodge skill (not default) for the next game-minute, in addition to any other benefits.

Randomizer of Theft

The first Randomizers appeared shortly after Janus started creating Merry Pranksters. Like their Angelic counterparts, they always seem to be created fully-fledged. It's suggested that Valefor may not actually create them at all. There have always been rumors of "pure" celestial spirits, neither angel nor demon, which spontaneously come into existence in out of the way places of the celestial planes. If they exist, they must be short-lived. Valefor may just have worked out a way to stabilize them (or stole the trick from Janus), bringing them into full alignment with Hell.

The entire idea is incredibly unlikely, but then, "unlikely" is a Randomizer's meat and drink.

Randomizers of Theft don't spend much time in Hell, compared to other Bands: there's not much for them to do there. Likewise, while they enjoy the ethereal plane, the fluid nature of reality there makes them fairly superfluous. They shine in corporeal arenas, however: Valefor practically abandons them on Earth, no doubt assuming that they're capable of getting up to mischief all on their own.

Randomizer (Restricted)

Some items - or people - seem to be foci for improbable events. Sometimes the events are consistently good, sometimes bad, and sometimes just weird. Randomizers of Theft can instantly recognize one of these foci, as well as the general type of oddities that surround them. This is usually good for a +1 to their check digits for any skill, as long as they can plausibly include the foci somehow.

Randomizers with other Demon Princes

Valefor refuses to let any Randomizer he creates out of his (admittedly loose) control, for reasons known only to him. Fallen Randomizers are well advised to work for him as well: there's an unofficial standing reward for "Renegades". Those few that (permanently) work for other Princes usually get a Calabite or Impudite Band Attunement, in place of the standard Attunement from Theft. They also spend most of their time in Hell looking over their shoulder.